Before you can learn how to overcome fear, you need to know what fear is.
The human body is an amazing machine. Our genes are designed to survive and to replicate. Our emotion system drives us to do the things we have to do in order to survive and replicate. When we are attracted to someone, we feel the drive for sex in order to create new humans. When we are standing on the edge of a cliff, we feel afraid, because it puts us in danger. But what if you were to feel afraid of social situations, that are necessary for replication?
If you are afraid of social situations, your body is in conflict. You are afraid, because your body thinks it lowers your chances of survival and that makes you frustrated because it actually lowers your chances of replication. You need to learn how to overcome fear in order to resolve that conflict.
Many people learned how to overcome fear and say that it's the most rewarding thing they have ever done in their lives. I am one of those people. I used to live in so much fear, I wouldn't even go outside of my house.
I learned how to overcome fear and now, I could not be happier with my life. I have good friends, I'm in an awesome relationship and my confidence has never been higher. Thinking back on what my life was like before i learned how to overcome fear, actually makes me realize what a terrible life it was.
I learned how to overcome fear the hard way. I had to figure out how to overcome fear all by myself. I thought the only way to overcome fear is to confront it and so I did. I made fear my guide. Whenever I felt afraid of doing something, I let that be a trigger to go do it.
I did all my groceries online, because I was afraid to go outside. So the first thing I did was going to the supermarket. After a few times, I wasn't afraid to do that anymore, so I needed something else to do. I was afraid to go to social gatherings, so I went to a bar. I only stayed at that bar for about half an hour and I didn't talk to anyone. Next time I stayed for an hour and had some small-talk with one person.
I kept doing things I was afraid to do and one night while I was lying in my bed after another terrifying day, I noticed something.. I didn't feel depressed anymore.
Even though my life was still not what I wanted it to be, and I was still afraid of most things, at least I was working on it and my body rewarded me by giving me feelings of happiness. That motivated me to keep going and soon enough I had a couple of great friends and I was the life of every party I went to. I was killing the karaoke machine and I wasn't even afraid to talk to the most beautiful girls at the bar.
Like I said, I learned how to overcome fear the hard way. But nowadays there are a lot of great books and programs that are able to ease the process.
Probably the most successful program on the market today is the Panic Away program. It seems to be focussed most on panic attacks, but it also teaches how to overcome fear and general anxiety.
Also be sure to check out this website on how to overcome fear and this blog on how to overcome fear.
One other thing I definitely recommend is reading this article on how to overcome anxiety.
